What Grief Has Taught Me!

“Grief has taught me that loss changes us, but it also deepens us. It opens our hearts to

compassion, to memory, and to the quiet beauty of continuing with love still guiding the

way.”

In the years since David’s passing, I’ve learned that grief is not a chapter that closes---it’s a

story that continues to unfold. Through the comfort of familiar recipes, the sharing of

memories, and the quiet reflection that comes with time, I’ve discovered that grief has

much to teach us about love, resilience, and life itself. These lessons didn’t arrive at once, but gently, over the years---whispered through moments of sorrow and joy, through tears and laughter, and through the deep reminder that love never truly leaves us.

It's been years since I lost my husband, yet grief continues to walk beside me. Over time,

I’ve said goodbye to other dear family and friends as well----each loss unique, each one

reshaping my heart in a different way. I used to think that grief had an ending point, that

with enough time, the sharp edges would soften and fade away. But what I’ve learned is

that grief doesn’t end. It changes. It moves with us, grows with us, and becomes a quiet

companion that reminds us of the love we still hold.

Through the years, grief has been both a teacher and a mirror, reflecting lessons I didn’t

seek but now cherish deeply.

1. Grief doesn’t end---it changes.

In the beginning, grief feels heavy, like fog that won’t lift. But over time, something shifts.

The pain doesn’t vanish, but it becomes less consuming. It softens into something I carry

rather than something that carries me. I’ve come to see grief not as a sign of weakness, but as

evidence of deep love---a love that has nowhere to go but inward, where it continues to live.

2. Love doesn’t disappear.

The love I shared with David is as strong now as it was when he was alive. It shows up in

small, unexpected moments---a song on the radio, a recipe he loved, my sons saying one of

the many funny phrases he used to say (he had many!). I’ve learned that love is not confined

to life; it stretches beyond it. It finds a way to be present. Sometimes that love feels like

comfort, and sometimes it brings tears, but it’s always there---reminding me that connection

doesn’t end when the heartbeat does.

3. Joy and Sorrow can coexist.

For a long time, I felt guilty when I laughed or enjoyed something simple, like a beautiful

walk or a shared meal. But I learned that joy doesn’t erase grief; it balances it. Life after loss

is not about choosing one or the other---it’s about learning that joy and sorrow can sit side by

side. They are both part of what it means to love deeply and to live fully. “He who has not

looked on Sorrow will never see Joy. ~Kahil Gibran

4. Compassion grows from loss.

Grief has deepened my understanding of others. When I meet someone who has lost someone they love, I no longer search for the right words---I simply listen, hold space, and understand that their pain is sacred. Compassion is one of grief’s quiet gifts. It opens our hearts to others in ways we couldn’t have known before.

In the end…….

What grief has taught me most is that love is everlasting. It changes form, but it never fades.

I carry the love of my husband and friends with me in everything I do---in the meals I cook,

the walks I take, and in the stories, I will continue to share. Grief has taught me to live with

tenderness, to honor what was, and to keep finding meaning in what is.

Grief is not something we “get over”. It’s something we grow around. And in that growing,

we learn to live again----gently, bravely, and with love still leading the way.

May you carry forward a sense of peace, wisdom, hope and love.

Take good care my friends